[W]hen the first crash came I couldn’t talk about it to anyone, I was embarrassed and tried to brush it of as a little blip a few weeks on holiday would change that, but of course it doesn’t, even without knowing it you start to suppress your feelings and find other ways to cope, with me it was work that I used to fill the void, and it worked to for the longest time, whilst piece by piece I was breaking down inside. . .
The second crash came and I took more notice as it was affecting my work in addition I was dealing with bullying in the workplace, and just under pressure, my health in general began to fail, I always had colds, my skin broke out and the tiredness, well put it this way sleep became a luxury, but still I fought it all with stubbornness, again ignoring advice to take things easier, seek help, I still didn’t believe this was happening to me.
The last and final crash was the worst I won’t get into here my previous posts go over that, I nearly went over the edge, and somehow I hung on , it was a last stand to recovery, which is an even rockier road to traverse, but each day I try to that is a positive, small victories are what I aim for and pass off bad days as just that.
The stigma that surrounds mental health is a tough one to crack, as people are conditioned to seeing it something to be avoided and only talked about in whispers, they don’t see the sheer courage it takes to come out and say I have Mental Health problems and I need help and ongoing support not avoidance, it’s everyone’s problem and making it taboo only drives this life changing illness further underground.
Read more of therabbitholez’s story. Visit Me & My Shadow | The Rabbit Hole.